Monday, January 23, 2006

A sign from God?

appendix to the last blog entry (so, read the previous post before this):

another thing to consider when/if moving back to Austria is my photography. The question is, how dependent is what I shoot on the fact that I live in NYC?
To me the rough edges of this city is what's appealing. All the irregularities, all the different worlds at odds or in harmony, the grime, the dirt, the ruggedness of the city, the shine, the splendor, and last but not least, the cornucopia of interesting faces to photograph.

What the hell am I going to photograph in freaggin' Vorarlberg? Everything is clean, in order, everyone looks pretty much the same, ...it's "perfect". I'm gonna have to do landscapes...ugh.
Dario says I'm overexaggerating. He validly pointed out that Austria is bordering on 9 countries, that we'll be travelling, and that we don't have to stay in rural Vorarlberg but could move to Vienna, where I - by the way - also got a job-offering (since yesterday). Why are these offers coming in only now? About a month too late?
But really, I don't want to go to Vienna, for then the girls will then just be again another kind of city kids. And if I had to pick, I'd rather have them be NYC kids. Better schools....believe it or not.

I asked God for a sign. And since I don't take in signs very well (too rational) I asked for it to be a strong very clear sign... one slap-me-over-the-head kinda sign.
So I had a dream. It was very short and weird. I dreamed that the tree in front of our building was on fire. Slowly burning.

Then my girlfriend Nadine called me to ask about my decision. I told her about me asking God for a sign (to show me in my dreams) and the strange completely inconclusive dream I then had and she immediately compared it to the burning bush story in the Bible. We had to google it, though, since she couldn't remember if God (speaking from the burning bush) told Moses to go on his journey or to stay put.
Turns out God told Moses to have faith and to lead his people into Egypt (or..wherever...already forgot where to...was it to Egypt or to Israel? anyway, the point is that he told him not to be afraid and to go on this journey.)

Since I don't want to make my final decision based on a dream I would love if God could be a little more clear with his opinion (like an e-mail, or something) ...but that's not going to happen...and I better watch out with my tone here before it turns blasphemic and then I'll have no guidance at all.

So, I'm almost there....and I do have faith...but ya' know...I'm a skeptic.

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